BUT I WANT THE SUNSHINE ALL THE TIME!

I know you have heard the saying that in “everyone’s life a little rain must fall” and while I know common sense tells me that everyday cannot be all sunshine and roses; this past weekend made me want to try to fly away to Never land and never return. It started when my feet hit the floor and my left leg decided that it had a bone to pick with me! I mean my goodness when I told it to go forward it decided that it would BUT not without a painful protest!

And if that wasn’t bad enough my BACK decided that it was feeling left out so it wanted to make it’s voice heard as well. To make matter’s worse, I had an important event to attend where I was one of the featured speaker’s but little did I know that my body was not going to be my friend this day and the rest of the weekend. Oh, and did I mention that my bowel’s wanted a part of the action as well? You guess it I needed to become very mindful of where the bathrooms were located so I could get to it quickly! Talk about the “perfect storm” of whatever physically can go wrong with your body at one given time is not a MYTH!

So between the battle of my left leg and my back my tommy jumped in and started rumbling and bubbling and sending dire messages to a lower part of my body that a munity needed to occur. In other words I was a HEALTH MESS! this weekend and it took all I had not to throw in the towel and just stay home and wallow in self pity, pain and other such things.

I WANTED MY SUNSHINE! I just wanted to feel well and if I could have found a four leaf clover or wishing well I would have poured all my heart and soul into it to beg it to make me feel better from now on! But of course coming back down to earth you know that our lives do not operate this way; we have good days and bad days and sometime in-between one’s. I guess what I am trying to say that as of TODAY I feel pretty good and when I look back on this past weekend I am still so thankful to Jesus that I am still sucking air! Am I still in pain? Yes, but not as bad as over the weekend and if there was a teaching moment to be had it was for me to learn to lean on God and let Him help me when man or myself cannot.

Hopefully I brought a little sunshine to whomever will read this blog I pray that you have MORE sunshine than rain but that you make it through whatever comes your way.

 

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What is our purpose?

I had often wondered what is my purpose in life? I mean when I started out I had some idea what I wanted to be and where I wanted to go but as time progressed all of that changed in “Ephesians 2:10 states” For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Sounds pretty clear cut doesn’t it? So why do I find myself at 60 still asking the question what was I born to do in this life? In Psalm 139:16 states “You saw me before I was born, Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” And while I love this passage I still do not get it! I mean all that I have experienced and gone through was planned for me to do so? I can see why other’s would just tell you to Trust Jesus and let Him guide you to your purpose even if you have to go through bad stuff and good stuff I guess in a way it does shape who you will become in this life.

And when I really think deep about it I guess it is true for when I used to a poetry venue at Kijiji’s Coffee House on Jefferson St. years ago I never dreamed that it would prepare me in some way to speak on cervical cancer as a survivor and not be afraid to speak in public in fact I enjoy being on stage and thinking that I am helping people by telling my story of survival. I guess that we as human’s try too hard to control our life and where it will go when we really should ” Let go and let God” take the wheel.